DOCUMENT: Florida, Crime

Man Wielded Cheeseburger In Domestic Battery

Cops: Defendant, 30, slapped girlfriend in head

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Cheeseburger Battery

MAY 14--A Florida Man is facing a criminal charge after he allegedly woke his longtime girlfriend up by “slapping her with a cheeseburger” and then pulled her hair and kicked her, according to an arrest affidavit.

Police say that Kyle Jamison Jones, 30, wielded the cheeseburger during a May 4 confrontation in the Jensen Beach home he shares with his girlfriend of seven years.

Cops responding to a reported 4:20 AM domestic disturbance were told by the 28-year-old victim that Jones, seen above, “woke her up by slapping her with a cheeseburger.” During an ensuing verbal argument, the woman said, Jones pulled her hair and kicked her down the stairs.

While unable to identify any physical injuries on the victim, a cop noted that, “I was able to locate several remnants of said cheeseburger on her person.” The woman, who declined medical treatment, told police that she did not want Jones arrested, instead she “only wished for law enforcement to speak to him.”

During a police interview, Jones acknowledged that “a verbal argument and physical altercation” took place, but he “decided to remain silent” when asked further about the confrontation.

Charged with battery, Jones was booked into the Martin County jail on the misdemeanor charge. He was subsequently freed on $1000 bond and is scheduled for arraignment on May 30.

A judge has ordered Jones to have no contact with the victim. (2 pages)