Buster

Two weeks after Customs and Border Protection agents at John F. Kennedy International Airport caught this guy with 10 pounds of cocaine affixed to his legs, investigators nabbed another would-be smuggler with narcotics taped to his lower limbs.

Mayobanex Ruiz Gomez was busted yesterday upon arrival in New York from the Dominican Republic (where he resides). After Gomez “exhibited numerous signs of nervousness” while his suitcase was being examined, he was subjected to a physical search.

As seen in the above evidence photo, agents subsequently discovered about five pounds of cocaine duct taped to Gomez’s legs. The cocaine, officials said, has an estimated street value of $83,000.

Gomez was arrested on a federal narcotics smuggling charge.

Meet Carl Puia.

Like many of his fellow Americans, the 74-year-old Connecticut man dislikes “Kim Kardashian and people like her.” This fact emerged yesterday after Puia was arrested for destroying six copies of “Selfish,” Kardashian’s book of selfies, at a Barnes & Noble near his Glastonbury residence.

Seen above, Puia turned himself in on an arrest warrant charging him with vandalism for allegedly pouring “a red liquid” over the books last October. Puia, cops report, “left a lengthy typed note for Barnes and Noble stating his dislike for Kim Kardashian and people like her.”

Puia, free on $2500 bond, is scheduled for a March 22 court appearance on the misdemeanor criminal mischief charge.

Published in 2015, “Selfish” contains hundreds of photos Kardashian took of herself. Upon releasing the book, Rizzoli described the author as a “trailblazer of the ‘selfie movement.’”

Meet Joshua Fletcher.

The 34-year-old Floridian was arrested early yesterday on a warrant charging him with violating terms of a probation sentence imposed following his guilty plea to a misdemeanor domestic violence charge.

As Fletcher was being booked into the Duval County lockup in Jacksonville, jailers discovered that he had a large stash of the antidepressant Alprazolam. Specifically, Fletcher was found with 54 pills, which, an officer reported, “appeared to come from the suspect's anus.”

Seen above, Fletcher was charged with smuggling contraband into a correctional facility, a felony for which he is jailed in lieu of $10,000 bond. Fletcher, scheduled for a March 21 arraignment, has previously been convicted of burglary, cocaine possession, trespass, credit card fraud, and marijuana possession.

The pills from inside Fletcher were “taken to the property room,” according to an arrest report that does not disclose which poor public servant had to gather up and count the pieces of evidence.

A judge has issued an arrest warrant for a South Carolina woman who allegedly assaulted her ex-boyfriend after “yelling profanities and throwing sex toys around” the victim’s residence, according to a police report.

Investigators charge that Kelly Godfrey, 30, arrived uninvited last night to the Spartanburg home of her former beau (whom Godfrey dated and lived with for about five months).

The 34-year-old victim told cops that after he told Godfrey to leave, she “started yelling profanities and throwing sex toys around the residence." A witness told police that an agitated Godfrey was screaming “fags and dildos!” The witness added that he “tried to get Ms. Godfrey to calm down and not yell about dildos” since the victim’s two young children were present.

Godfrey, seen at right, allegedly struck the victim in the face and threw him around the residence. By the time cops arrived at the victim’s home, Godfrey had already departed. A judge subsequently issued an arrest warrant charging Godfrey with domestic violence. According to court records, Godfrey has two other pending domestic violence cases (for which she is free on bond).

It is unclear whether anyone was hit by the sex toys that took flight Tuesday evening.

A man wearing “pink lingerie under his lowered sweatpants” was arrested yesterday after being found passed out with his penis in his hands inside a stolen Buick sedan that was stopped in the middle of a busy Pittsburgh intersection, police report.

Daniel Marchese, 51, was collared Monday afternoon by police who discovered him with "his pants lowered to the middle of his thighs." Two witnesses told cops that they spotted Marchese “masturbating and passed out behind the wheel of his vehicle.”

As reported by the Tribune-Review's Megan Guza, Marchese scuffled with officers who took him into custody. When asked if he had ID, Marchese repled, “How about fuck you, your mother’s a nigger loving whore.” Things went downhill from there, according to a criminal complaint which does not further address Marchese’s pink lingerie.

Pictured above, Marchese was charged with an assortment of crimes, including aggravated assault, indecent exposure, drunk driving, receiving stolen property, firearms possession, and making terroristic threats.

A police search of the car’s trunk turned up two handguns. Officers also seized an open bottle of Jack Daniels whiskey, which was found wedged between Marchese’s left leg and the driver’s side door.

Marchese, arraigned today on the felony and misdemeanor counts, has been unable to post his $35,000 bail, so he remains locked up in the Allegheny County jail. Marchese’s lengthy rap sheet includes busts for drug possession; endangering the welfare of a child; possession of drug paraphernalia; assault; disorderly conduct; harassment; public drunkenness; theft; trespass; and receiving stolen property.

A substitute teacher was arrested yesterday for indecent exposure after she performed a cartwheel in a high school choir class “with no under garments on,” police allege.

According to cops, Lacey Sponsler, 34, exposed herself to students last Friday at Pawhuska High School in Pawhuska, a city about 50 miles north of Tulsa.

Sponsler, seen at right, was wearing a long dress, but no underwear, “which caused her to expose herself to the students in this class,” cops allege. “This act was captured by a student on their cell phone,” said Police Chief Scott Laird.

As detailed in a probable cause affidavit, as Sponsler (seen above) performed the cartwheel in the “Junior High Choir room,” her dress was “flipped up,” exposing her buttocks. An officer who reviewed the video of the incident added, “I further noticed that the Defendant was not wearing any type of underwear.”

A 17-year-old female student told police that Sponsler “had said that she was not wearing underwear before performing the cartwheel,” which exposed her “bare vagina.” The student noted that she saw Sponsler’s “vagina open and close, as her legs were in the air.” The girl also told police that Sponsler “had been talking about using drugs” and commented on how she “thought fourteen year old boys were like men.”

When questioned by police, Sponsler initially denied performing the cartwheel in class. When told that a student captured the cartwheel in a Snapchat video, Sponsler replied that she “did not remember performing a cartwheel or exposing her vagina and buttocks.”

Sponsler told police that she was “just dancing with the students” and "trying to be a cool teacher."

According to court records, Sponsler pleaded guilty in 2008 to marijuana possession, public intoxication, and possession of drug paraphernalia (for which she received a two-year deferred sentence, was fined $1100, and was ordered to perform 100 hours of community service). In December 2009, a judge ruled that Sponsler violated her probation, in part because she had not disclosed being questioned by police investigating an accused meth cook. Sponsler told cops that she had been present in the suspect’s home when he was manufacturing the drug, adding that the man was “careless when he cooks.”

In September 2011, Sponsler pleaded guilty to possession of methamphetamine and marijuana in the presence of a child and possession of drug paraphernalia. She was sentenced to a three-year deferred sentence. As part of that plea deal, prosecutors dropped a burglary charge against Sponsler, who is pictured below in a mug shot snapped yesterday.