Buster

A naked woman on a midnight golf cart joyride was arrested early Saturday when she drove through a police perimeter in Florida, cops say.

While officers were involved in an armed standoff with a teenager, Jessica Smith, 28, drove past several patrol cars while behind the wheel of a golf cart. Smith allegedly ignored a police command to depart the area and continued to approach “the target house of where the armed suspect was on the roof.”

When Smith, police say, refused to exit the golf cart, she “was assisted out and handcuffed” around 12:05 AM. Smith smelled of alcohol and was “completely nude,” according to a criminal complaint charging her with obstruction, a misdemeanor.

The complaint lists Smith’s home address as a residence in West Roxbury, Massachusetts. Smith’s parents own a home about a mile from where she was arrested in Dunedin, a city in the Tampa Bay area.

Investigators allege that Smith’s naked antics “put multiple deputies at risk for potentially getting shot at.”

Seen above, Smith was released on her own recognizance from the Pinellas County jail around 7 AM Saturday.

The naked woman who recently was found skinny-dipping in a stranger’s pool has copped a plea to a pair of misdemeanor criminal charges, according to Florida court records.

Heather Kennedy, 42, pleaded no contest Monday to trespass and resisting charges in connection with a bizarre July incident at a residence in Port Charlotte. A judge sentenced Kennedy to time she had already served in the Charlotte County jail and fined her $320.

Kennedy was arrested after James Clark, 69, called 911 upon returning from a doctor’s visit to discover "a naked white female in the pool." As seen above, Kennedy was still in the water when sheriff’s deputies arrived at Clark's home.

After being coaxed out of the pool, Kennedy struggled with deputies as they attempted to handcuff her.

Days after being released from custody for the July 19 pool incursion, Kennedy was arrested for breaking into a truck. Along with burglary, theft, and criminal mischief counts, Kennedy (seen at right) was also charged with possession of drug paraphernalia and introducing contraband into a correctional facility.

The latter two charges stemmed from the discovery by jailers of a methamphetamine pipe inside Kennedy’s vagina.

Kennedy’s list of legal troubles also includes a probation violation charge related to her conviction earlier this year on a felony narcotics possession rap. Prosecutors contend that Kennedy’s most recent collars violated terms of an April 2021 probationary sentence.

The narcotics case resulted from a traffic stop that yielded morphine pills, marijuana, and crack and meth pipes. Kennedy denied ownership of the pills, claiming they were the property of "a male by the name of Crackhead Chris," according to a police report.

Kennedy is being held in the Charlotte County jail in Punta Gorda.

When a “very large bag of marijuana” tumbles out of your shirt after the handcuffs have been applied, do not be surprised when the cops ignore your disavowal of ownership of said weed.

Police responding early Saturday to calls about a disturbance at an Iowa apartment building discovered Kyle Clark, 19, and another man “face to face yelling at each other,” according to a criminal complaint.

Upon spotting the Iowa City Police Department officers, Clark tried to walk away from cops, who noticed he “had a very large bulge under his shirt near the waist line like he was trying to hide something.”

When a cop asked if the protuberance was “a bag of weed,” Clark reportedly “tried to walk down the stairs which was a dead end.”

After Clark was handcuffed around 3 AM, “a very large bag of marijuana fell from under his shirt. He claimed it wasn’t his,” reported Officer Tyler Lakose. The complaint does not indicate whether Clark explained why he had someone else’s stash--which weighed about four ounces--nestled against his belly

Clark was charged with felony and misdemeanor drug counts and booked into the Johnson County jail, from which he was released late Saturday morning.

In a similar case, a Louisiana woman denied ownership of methamphetamine that was discovered inside her vagina during a 2019 jail strip search. She subsequently pleaded guilty to a felony narcotics charge.

The Tesla owner who was watching a movie when his car, traveling in autopilot mode, struck a North Carolina police cruiser has walked away from the crash legally unscathed, records show.

Prosecutors recently dismissed a pair of charges filed against Devainder Goli following the August 2020 crash on Highway 64 near Raleigh. Goli, a 67-year-old doctor, was cited for watching TV while driving and failing to move over.

Both counts were dropped last month by prosecutors, according to a District Court filing which does not offer an explanation for the dismissal, but indicates that Goli’s insurer paid more than $28,000 in property damage claims.

Goli’s lawyer, Henry Neese, did not return TSG calls about the case. In an email, Heather Nicol, a spokesperson for the prosecutor’s office, wrote that the dismissal notice “is all we will be legal able to tell you. Have a wonderful day.”

According to police, Goli (seen at right) was driving home around midnight when his 2015 Tesla Model S sedan struck a Nash County Sheriff's Office squad car, which then caromed into a North Carolina State Highway Patrol vehicle. Both autos were stopped on the highway due to an earlier accident.

Two cops--who were both outside their vehicles--were knocked to the ground in the crash, but not seriously injured.

A police investigation determined that Goli was watching a movie on his phone while the Tesla traveled in autopilot mode, guided by a series of cameras and ultrasonic sensors.

As seen in the below evidence photos, Goli’s Tesla and the sheriff’s vehicle suffered significant damage in the crash.

The 23-year-old woman seen here was photographed this week upon entry to a Michigan county jail.

The whereabouts of her missing hair are unknown.

During a dispute over whether to watch cartoons or the show “Monk,” a Florida Man struck his roommate at an assisted living facility over the head with his cane, according to cops who arrested the accused assailant on a felony charge.

Investigators say that Glenn Hutchinson, 58, struck the 56-year-old disabled victim during a confrontation Sunday evening at the Midway Manor facility in Clearwater. Both men are residents there due to “a variety of physical conditions,” according to an arrest affidavit.

While his roommate sought to watch cartoons, Hutchinson preferred to view “Monk,” the police procedural starring Tony Shalhoub as an obsessive-compulsive sleuth. The pair’s argument over the TV turned violent when Hutchinson hit the victim, Edward Vance Davis, on the head with his aluminum cane.

Hutchinson told police that Davis “drove his motorized scooter into his leg,” prompting him to swing the cane in self-defense. Davis, who was left with a “visible mark” due to the cane blow, was not transported to a hospital.

Charged with aggravated battery with a deadly weapon, Hutchinson was booked into the county jail, where he remains behind bars in lieu of $5000 bond. A judge has ordered him to have no contact with Davis.