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    Incensed that his pizza did not include the requested toppings, a Maryland man allegedly assaulted a Papa John’s worker with a metal pizza paddle in an attack that ended with the employee stabbing the customer in the stomach with a “pizza spear,” according to police.

    Investigators say that after purchasing a pizza Wednesday evening, Herbert Harris, 40, returned to a Papa John’s in Woodbridge, a community 20 miles outside Baltimore, to “complain that garlic sauce and pepperoncinis were not included with the pizza.”

    Harris, cops say, argued about the missing Italian peppers and garlic sauce with Robert Klein, a 26-year-old Papa John’s employee. During the dispute, Harris went behind the counter and “began chasing Klein around the store, physically assaulting him with a metal pizza paddle,” according to the Harford County Sheriff’s Office.

    “Unable to escape the physical assault and in fear of his safety,” Klein “grabbed a pizza spear to defend himself from the attack, and stabbed Harris in self-defense,” investigators say. The spear is not further described in a police statement.

    When cops arrived at Papa John’s, Harris, who lives two miles from the restaurant, was holding a t-shirt to a stab wound in his stomach. He was subsequently transported to a local hospital for “treatment of non-life-threatening injuries,” cops noted.

    Charged with misdemeanor assault, Harris is scheduled for a September 20 District Court appearance.

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    During an argument at Burger King, a Florida Man threw a cheeseburger at his girlfriend with such force that when the sandwich struck the back of her head, the woman fell “over a curb onto the ground,” police charge.

    According to a criminal complaint, James Hunt, 41, and his “girlfriend and cohabitant” argued Saturday afternoon about “the victim not eating her food” at a Burger King in Clearwater, a city in the Tampa Bay area.

    The dispute turned violent, cops say, when the 53-year-old woman began to leave the restaurant. That is when Hunt (seen at right) allegedly “threw a cheeseburger at the victim, striking her in the back of the head. This action caused the victim to fall over a curb onto the ground.”

    The victim’s chin and lip hit the pavement, resulting in an abrasion and a cut. Upon arriving at the Burger King, cops observed blood on the victim’s shirt and shorts and cheese on her shirt and in her hair.

    A Burger King worker told cops that before Hunt walked away from the restaurant, he struck the victim in the head while she was on the ground.

    While Hunt reportedly “admitted to throwing the burger at the victim,” he denied striking her while she was down. Hunt also told police that he did not think the cheeseburger strike “caused her to slip on the curb and fall onto the ground.”

    Charged with felony domestic battery, Hunt is being held in the county jail on $15,000 bond and has been ordered by a judge to have no contact with the victim. Hunt, identified as a mechanic in court papers, has two prior domestic battery convictions, both of which date back to 2002 in Arkansas.

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    An Alabama woman facing methamphetamine charges was wearing a Walter White t-shirt when arrested last night for failing to appear in court on the drug counts.

    Misty Mays, 50, was collared Sunday evening on a misdemeanor rap for a court no-show in connection with her February arrest for possession of meth and drug paraphernalia (a meth pipe).

    Mays was arrested earlier this year following an 11:30 PM traffic stop in Wetumpka, a city about 20 miles north of Montgomery. A police search turned up the meth and the pipe, investigators say.

    As seen above, when Mays was apprehended yesterday on the failure to appear rap, she was wearing a mint-colored shirt with a large photo of White, the teacher-turned-meth kingpin portrayed by Bryan Cranston in “Breaking Bad.” In the photo, seen below, White/Cranston is pictured surrounded by stacks of cash.

    Mays is being held in the Elmore County lockup in lieu of $20,500 bond, according to jail records.

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    “Meth is legal now.”

    That is what Enzo Zabala-Cardozo, 31, “advised” Florida cops who caught him, glass pipe at his lips, attempting to light up early yesterday in a St. Petersburg alleyway, according to an arrest affidavit.

    Upon spotting police, Zabala-Cardozo began walking away, but not before declaring that, “Meth is legal now.” He did not offer further details as to when lawmakers legalized use of the highly addictive stimulant.

    As it turns out, however, meth possession is still a crime in the Free State of Florida™. As such, Zabala-Cardozo was busted on a felony drug possession charge and a misdemeanor count of resisting police.

    Pictured at right, Zabala-Cardozo was booked into the county jail on $2150 bond. At the time of his 3:50 AM arrest Thursday, Zabala-Cardozo was free on bond in connection with his arrest in late-May for possession of meth and drug paraphernalia.

    Zabala-Cardozo’s rap sheet includes multiple convictions for narcotics possession, as well as convictions for trespass, disorderly conduct, obstruction, and assault.

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    A reputed Florida gang member is facing a felony charge for uploading a homemade rap video to YouTube, court records show.

    Tito Burney is a member of St. Petersburg’s Auburn Park crew, according to police who Tuesday arrested the 26-year-old on multiple felony counts. Burney, seen below, is locked up on $80,000 bond.

    Citing a law barring “criminal gang electronic communication,” police collared Burney for posting “Aint Duckin No Rec” to YouTube in mid-February. The 2:21 rap song, which has been viewed about 2100 times and has garnered four comments, is one of three videos on Burney’s YouTube page (which has 237 subscribers).

    Police allege that the song contains lyrics that “are being utilized to benefit, promote, or further the interests of the Auburn Park gang” and “intimidate or harass other persons.” Specifically, a police detective in an arrest affidavit noted that Burney rapped about handling “beef” with firearms and spoke of “doing a drive by shooting” with a TEC-9 submachine gun.

    In the video, which was filmed outside a St. Petersburg food market, Burney--who is wearing a balaclava and a Lacoste t-shirt--“appears to be holding real firearms,” Detective Michael Bletsch alleged.

    When Burney was apprehended Tuesday evening on the rap video count, he was allegedly carrying a stolen Beretta handgun, which allowed cops to charge him with three additional felonies.

    Burney’s rap sheet includes convictions for criminal mischief; grand theft auto; possession of drug paraphernalia; obstructing police; trespass; heroin possession; fleeing law enforcement; Ecstasy possession; and firearms possession by a convicted felon.

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    A Florida inmate charged with punching a corrections officer in the face said that she walloped the female victim because she “was bored” and “had nothing else to do,” according to a court filing.

    Investigators say the deputy yesterday was escorting Jazmyne Levesque, 23, to a pod inside the Pinellas County jail when Levesque attacked. The deputy was “taken to a walk in clinic for treatment,” an arrest affidavit states.

    After being read her rights, Levesque, seen at right, reportedly copped to the battery, saying she attacked the deputy “because she was bored, had nothing else to do, and was already in a couple of fights earlier in the day.”

    Levesque was charged with a felony count of battery on a law enforcement officer.

    Levesque was jailed earlier this month for allegedly throwing punches at a municipal bus driver and getting in a female cop’s face and yelling, “I am threatening you right now! Do your fucking jobs you idiot!” She was charged with assault on a law enforcement officer and assault on a public transit employee.

    At the time of her July 14 collar, Levesque was free on bond in a felony grand theft case (which remains pending). She has been charged with stealing nearly $2400 in merchandise from an Ulta Beauty store near her residence in Tarpon Springs, a Tampa suburb.

    After police found 87 cosmetic items stashed in her purse, Levesque reportedly copped to the theft, saying that she intended to use the stolen goods to “beautify” herself.

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    A “heavily intoxicated” Florida Man was arrested Saturday night for calling 911 to report that his girlfriend “wished to eat Sour Patch Kids” according to police.

    An arrest affidavit does not reveal why Joshua Larson, 37, allegedly phoned the police emergency number at 11:45 PM with the candy dispatch.

    When asked about the call by a sheriff’s deputy, Larson “smiled and walked away” from cops outside his residence in Madeira Beach, a city 10 miles from St. Petersburg.

    Seen above, Larson allegedly struggled with deputies as they sought to place him in handcuffs. An “electronic control weapon” was eventually used to take Larson into custody, according to the affidavit.

    Charged with misuse of the 911 system and obstruction, Larson was booked into the county jail, from which he was freed yesterday afternoon on his own recognizance. As part of his release conditions, Larson has been ordered by a judge to not consume alcohol and has been outfitted with an alcohol monitoring device.

    Larson was arrested in November for allegedly shoving his girlfriend and knocking her phone from her hand during an altercation in their Clearwater apartment. Prosecutors subsequently declined to pursue a misdemeanor domestic battery count against Larson.

    It is unclear whether the alleged victim in the 2021 case is the same woman who sought to consume the Sour Patch Kids candy.

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    A New Hampshire man wearing a t-shirt bearing a mug shot of country singer Morgan Wallen posed for his own booking photo Friday evening.

    Zachary Horne, 20, was collared for underage possession of alcohol and booked into the Belknap County jail in Laconia.

    As seen at right, Horne was wearing a t-shirt with Wallen’s mug shot printed on the front.

    The country music superstar was arrested in May 2020 for public intoxication and disorderly conduct following a disturbance at Kid Rock's Big Ass Honky Tonk Rock N' Roll Steakhouse in Nashville, Tennessee (prosecutors subsequently declined to pursue charges against the 29-year-old performer).

    Shirts, hoodies, and socks containing the booking photo of Wallen--whose album “Dangerous: The Double Album” last year sold more units than any other release--are widely available online.

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    A woman found naked from the waist down told Pennsylvania police that snakes had eaten her pants, according to a court filing.

    Responding last Thursday afternoon to multiple 911 calls about a half-dressed woman walking in the middle of a road about 25 miles from Philadelphia, cops found Gloria Harpel, 35, “naked from the waist down and she was rambling.”

    Harpel, who police suspected of narcotics use, initially said that she had put her pants in a storm drain before contending that “snakes had eaten them.”

    Pictured at right, Harpel--who was reportedly “sweating profusely” and “making nonsensical outbursts”--was arrested for indecent exposure, disorderly conduct, and public drunkenness. She was booked into the Montgomery County jail on the misdemeanor counts.

    A probable cause affidavit does not provide a further description of the purported trouser snakes.

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    Perhaps a name change is in order for Le'Genius Williams.

    The 22-year-old Floridian--who has already served prison time for attempted murder and robbery--is back behind bars on an assortment of felony gun and drug charges following his arrest Monday night.

    Police allege that Williams struck his girlfriend in the face with a handgun and then fled the St. Petersburg crime scene in a Chevy driven by another man.

    Cops performed a pit maneuver to stop the vehicle and then arrested Williams and the driver. A search of the car uncovered a pair of loaded firearms, as well as cocaine and fentanyl, according to a court filing.

    Seen above, Williams was booked into the county jail for aggravated domestic battery, drug trafficking, narcotics possession, and weapons offenses. He is being held in lieu of $77,000 bond.

    In 2013, when Williams was 13, he was arrested for shooting a 15-year-old boy. He was subsequently sentenced to eight years in prison for attempted murder (as well as an unrelated robbery charge).     

    Five months after his release from state prison in late-2020, Williams was arrested for cocaine possession, driving without a license, and illegally possessing a handgun (he was freed last February on $12,000 bond). The 2021 case is pending and a judge this week revoked Williams’s bond in light of his latest arrest.

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    A trespassing suspect with “his pants opened and genitals exposed” explained to Florida police that he was “doing a chant and was cleansing himself spiritually” when he was discovered at 2:15 AM on the premises of a closed Mexican restaurant, according to a court filing.

    Cops say that Kenneth Grey, 29, tripped a silent alarm after jumping a fence early Monday at the Red Mesa Cantina in St. Petersburg.

    When officers arrived at the restaurant, Grey was seated inside a fenced area near the outdoor bar “with his pants opened and genitals exposed.” Grey, seen at right, was detained and subsequently charged with loitering and prowling, a misdemeanor.

    After being read his rights, Grey reportedly acknowledged trespassing and told police he was “doing a chant and was cleansing himself spiritually.”

    Grey is locked up in lieu of $250 bond and has been ordered to stay away from the restaurant. His rap sheet includes prior convictions for trespassing, obstructing police, and possession of an open container of alcohol.

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    Laughing as he recounted killing his father’s poodle, a Florida Man told cops that he buried the animal alive because “the dog was old, and he thought it was already dying,” according to an arrest affidavit.

    Police report that Tyler Crevasse, 33, yesterday confessed to wrapping the 18-year-old pet “in a wet towel while the dog was still alive and buried” the canine in the backyard of the Clearwater home he shares with his 61-year-old father.

    “The defendant kept laughing while he was making these statements,” a cop reported. The poodle was later discovered in the area where Crevasse reportedly confessed to burying the animal.

    After learning that his dog had been killed, the victim confronted Crevasse, who then allegedly punched his father in the nose twice. Crevasse, cops say, said the pair argued “after he told his father that he buried his dog alive in the backyard.”

    Pictured above, Crevasse was arrested for animal cruelty and domestic battery. He is being held in the county jail in lieu of $10,000 bond on the felony counts.

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    Meet Jacob Ryan Philbeck.

    The 29-year-old Florida Man made a series of 911 calls early yesterday to inform police dispatchers that President Joe Biden should be jailed, while convicted drug lord Joaquín “El Chapo” Guzmán should be freed from custody.

    In response to that legal advice--offered in three separate predawn calls--Philbeck was arrested for misuse of the 911 system, a misdemeanor.

    Dialing from an apartment in Palm Harbor, a Tampa suburb, Philbeck was initially informed that “the information he was providing was a non-emergency situation.” Philbeck was also warned not to use the 911 system in such a manner.

    Nevertheless, he persisted.

    Philbeck, a registered Republican voter, again called cops to say that, “President Biden needed to be placed in prison,” according to an arrest report. Philbeck also advised that, “El Chapo needed to be freed.”

    When deputies arrived at Philbeck’s residence, he was on the line with 911. That call was cut short by Philbeck’s 6 AM arrest. Seen above, Philbeck was booked into the county jail, from which he was released yesterday on $150 bond.

    With regard to Philbeck, the arrest report notes that there was an “Indication of Alcohol Influence.”

    In posts to his Facebook page, Philbeck has supported flying the Confederate flag, opposed gun control, and declared that “its scary to do research and find out how much todays democratic party and hitlers nazi germany have in common WOW.” In a 2018 post, Philbeck wrote, “for the record i am very conservative even more right than many republicans maybe im libertarian idk.”