DOCUMENT: Celebrity, Funny

Here Are The Miley Cyrus FCC Complaints

Viewers traumatized by twerking, foam-fingering act

Miley's foam finger

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Miley Cyrus FCC Letters

SEPTEMBER 13--Following Miley Cyrus’s raunchy performance at last month’s MTV Video Music Awards, 150 traumatized viewers wrote the Federal Communications Commission to express their outrage about the 20-year-old singer’s twerking, foam-fingering, skimpy costume, bumping, grinding, omnipresent tongue, and her interaction with oversize teddy bears.

The correspondence to the FCC, which was provided to TSG in response to a Freedom of Information Act request, demanded that government officials somehow fine or penalize Cyrus, singer Robin Thicke (upon whom Cyrus grinded), and the network for the August 25 broadcast.

However, the FCC only has authority to sanction broadcast television outlets--like CBS or NBC--for indecent conduct, not cable networks. So the complaints sent to the agency by outraged, scarred, and offended Americans must, statutorily, fall on deaf ears.

But that does not lessen their pure entertainment value, as seen in the following sampling of the missives. Click on each excerpt for a larger version of the respective letters.

FCC officials redacted the names of correspondents, most of whom lodged their beefs via a form on the agency's web site.

The highlights:

* Cyrus accused of “licking the butt of a stuff bear.”

* “Humped him like a bitch in heat.”

* Cyrus “touched the genitals of an older man while performing music.”

* “GOD HELP THIS NATION.”

* Cyrus was “acting like a devil flicking that tongue as deamons do.”

* Cyrus engaged in “implied sexual acts with bears.”

* “I suggest 12 months in a convent!”

* Cyrus’s grinding caused Thicke “to have a slight erection which can be easily noticed through his pants.”

* “The scars on our childrens minds cannot be easily erased.”

* Cyrus’s performance was “racist in that she was objectifying black women.”

* “Miley Cyrus needs to be spanked.”

* Woman’s 10-year-old girl “was compelled to bury her head under the covers.”

* “Much worse than that disaster at the super bowl with one of the jackson girls.”

* Dressed like a “whore,” Cyrus “put her face in a fake butt.”

* “It had children running to their parents, and parents jaws dropping.”

* “Miss Milly Cyrus should be fined and jailed.”

* Cyrus “groped a woman’s posterior—without hesitation.”

* “My daughter was even surprised of Slutty Cyrus.”

* Cyrus left “much of her lower buttocks hanging out of the bikini bottom.”

* “My family was horrified by this performance.”

* “She should be banned from all TV performances in the future!”

* Singer was guilty of “indicating oral sex, dog sex, etc.”

* “Good heavens! I’m certainly no prude, but even I was shocked.”

* Cyrus appeared “under the influence of drugs or alcohol.”

* “Just disgusting and almost made me want to puke.”

* Woman’s 10-year-old niece’s “excitement quickly turned into shock.”

* “As an educator I have to stand up and say, ‘Enough is enough.’”

* Cyrus appeared “like she just coked up back stage ….really !!!!!”

* “Dry humping, which they call twerking apparently.”

* “I was subjugated to 4 minutes of Miley Cyrus.”

* “Miley should be excommunicated from the music community!”

* “Where has censorship gone?”