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    Meet James Fleurant.

    The 28-year-old Florida Man was arrested early yesterday for misuse of the 911 system after he placed a bizarre 1:45 AM call to the police emergency line.

    Fleurant told an operator that he was “seeing aliens, little ones flying low to the ground,” according to an arrest affidavit.

    The Vero Beach resident added that he did not want “to go Independence Day on them,” an apparent reference to the movie starring Will Smith, Jeff Goldblum, and Bill Pullman.

    In the 1996 film, an invasion by alien aircraft is repelled, but not before earthlings suffer widespread death and destruction (including the incineration of poor Harvey Fierstein).

    Fleurant is locked up on $500 bond on the misdemeanor charge. His rap sheet includes convictions for battery, theft, and probation violation.

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    A Florida Man is accused of striking his girlfriend with a pumpkin and its innards during a 2 AM confrontation yesterday in the couple’s apartment, police report.

    According to a criminal complaint, Nathan Garisto, 26, was arrested Monday on a domestic battery charge. Garisto, free on $1000 bond, has been ordered to have no contact with the 29-year-old victim.

    Police say that when they responded to the couple’s Largo residence, the victim was “covered in pumpkin seeds and pulp.” Garisto, cops noted, was “heavily intoxicated while engaged in a verbal argument with his girlfriend.”

    After refusing his girlfriend’s requests to leave the home, Garisto allegedly “threw a pumpkin and all insides of the pumpkin at the subject,” the complaint alleges. When questioned by police, Garisto claimed that he only “threw the pumpkin at the sliding doors,” and not at the victim.

    Seen above, Garisto has pleaded not guilty to the misdemeanor count. A judge yesterday ordered him to wear an alcohol monitor as part of his bond conditions. Court records show that Garisto’s rap sheet includes convictions for drunk driving, marijuana possession, careless driving, and probation violation.

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    A Florida Woman arrested for trespassing was hit with a second criminal charge when, after being asked to identify herself, she repeatedly told cops that her name was “My butt just farted,” records show.

    Melinda Lynn Guerrero, 33, was collared Wednesday evening after refusing to leave a Mobil gas station in St. Petersburg.

    Following her arrest, Guerrero refused to provide her name to police, according to a criminal complaint. Cops asked “multiple times,” but “defendant repeatedly said, ‘My name is my butt just farted.”

    Officers subsequently identified Guerrero as the accused trespasser--likely due to the fact that her photo and fingerprints are on file in connection with a series of arrests over the past several years. Also, she has “Guerrero” tattooed on her back.

    Police noted that Guerrero may have been under the influence of drugs and/or alcohol.

    Charged with trespassing and providing a false name to law enforcement, both misdemeanors, Guerrero (seen above) was released yesterday afternoon from the county jail on her own recognizance.

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    A Florida Man slapped his girlfriend in the face with a slice of pizza, leaving her covered in “grease, red sauce, and food toppings,” according to police who arrested the accused batterer.

    Responding Wednesday night to a call about a disturbance at an apartment building in Port Charlotte, cops were met by the 51-year-old victim, who said that Sean Metcalf, 59, had "smacked her in the face with a piece of pizza."

    The woman said she was taking items to the trash when Metcalf became very angry and started to yell at her. Included in the material the woman planned on tossing was a pizza box she mistakenly thought was empty.

    “Sean told her not to throw his things away and became very angry,” according to a probable cause affidavit. The victim responded by tossing the pizza box back into the residence, causing slices to escape containment.

    Metcalf allegedly then approached his girlfriend, “picking up a slice of pizza and hitting the victim in the face and chest with it.”

    When questioned by cops, Metcalf admitted losing his cool and yelling at the victim, but denied the dispute became physical. He also claimed to have “no idea how pizza got all over the victim.”

    Seen above, Metcalf was arrested for domestic battery, a misdemeanor, and booked into the Charlotte County jail. He was released from custody Thursday after posting $2000 bond. A judge has ordered him to have no contact with the victim.

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    The theft of a man’s prosthetic leg has resulted in strong-arm robbery charges, cops say.

    According to investigators, Larry Stothers, 41, accused the victim of stealing a backpack. So Stothers and a cohort, 31-year-old Jayson Rappa, allegedly confronted the man Saturday afternoon in Largo, Florida.

    “A fight occurred between all parties,” according to an arrest affidavit. “And in the course of the fight a prosthetic leg was taken from the victim.” The man whose leg was stolen fled the scene and sought police assistance.

    Officers arrested Stothers and Rappa about an hour later, and charged each man with strong-arm robbery, a felony. Stothers (left) and Rappa are pictured in the above mug shots.

    Court records do not indicate whether the victim’s leg was recovered.

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    Meet George Vacherlon.

    The Florida Man, 48, was already shackled when cops took him into custody early Monday morning following a traffic stop in Eustis, a city about 40 miles from Orlando.

    Vacherlon, an ex-con whose rap sheet includes multiple felony convictions, was charged with possession of ammunition by a convicted felon after cops found a Remington .22 caliber round inside his Jeep’s driver door pocket.

    Vacherlon’s male passenger, with whom he shares a home address, was busted on drug charges after officers found methamphetamine and used syringes in his bag.  

    According to a Eustis Police Department report, Vacherlon, who is locked up on $10,000 bond, was “placed in handcuffs, that were double-locked and checked for proper fit.”

    It is unclear whether such care was taken when Vacherlon’s steel bondage collar went on earlier that evening.

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    A supermarket manager was pelted with boxes of frozen pizza by a Pennsylvania man who refused to wear a mask inside the store when approached by the worker, police allege.

    Cops today announced that Patrick Steiner, 35, has been charged with harassment and disorderly conduct in connection with an incident last month at a Giant Eagle store near his home in Altoona, a city about 80 miles east of Pittsburgh.

    According to the Logan Township Police Department, Steiner was inside the Giant Eagle on a Thursday afternoon when he refused to wear a mask when approached by the store manager.

    Steiner, investigators charge, then “threw boxes of frozen pizza at the manager and fled the store.” The victim provided cops with the license plate of Steiner’s car, which resulted in a traffic stop and the alleged pizza pelter’s arrest.

    Police did not indicate whether Steiner intended to purchase the pizzas or just retrieved them from a freezer for use as makeshift munitions.

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    Meet Bounty Cheramy.

    The 22-year-old Florida resident was arrested for drunk driving early Sunday after allegedly slamming his Mazda into an electronic sign cautioning motorists to “Drive Sober or Get Pulled Over.”

    According to a probable cause affidavit, cops found Cheramy outside his car around 12:30 AM on the Tamiami Trail in Port Charlotte on the state’s Gulf Coast. Cheramy’s auto had sustained “heavy front-end damage,” reported a deputy who also noted that “the county sign board trailer had been struck.”

    Cheramy told police that he was talking on the phone when he “suddenly struck something,” but was unsure “what he had struck or how he hit it.”

    The wrecked electronic sign is pictured below.

    Cheramy smelled of alcohol, was swaying back and forth, and could not focus on questions posed by a deputy, the affidavit alleges. Cheramy, who performed poorly on a series of field sobriety tests, took two breath tests, both of which recorded his blood alcohol content at twice the .08 legal limit.

    Cheramy was charged with a pair of DUI counts and careless driving. He is scheduled for arraignment on September 16.

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    A 74-year-old Florida landlord shoved a female tenant and then stole a Donald Trump flag that was displayed in the victim's yard, police charge.

    Cops say that Joseph Mazzara yesterday afternoon went into the “closed backyard of the victim to steal a Trump flag.” Mazzara, who owns the small apartment building where the woman lives, “had no right to enter the residence and was not performing his official landlord duties,” according to an arrest affidavit.

    Around 2:30 PM Monday, Mazzara arrived at the property (seen below) in Indian Rocks Beach, a city in the Tampa Bay area, and “forcefully pushed” Lisa Marie Pelland, 60, to gain access to the sideyard. After pushing Pelland, Mazzara “took the Trump flag and left the scene,” police reported.

    Pelland told cops she suffered minor bruising and had “grease/dirt marks on her arm from the defendant touching/striking her.”

    Pictured above, Mazzara was subsequently arrested and charged with felony battery. The enhanced count stems from the fact that Mazzara has a prior battery conviction (he was found guilty in 2017 of choking his daughter).

    Mazzara was freed last night from the county jail after posting $2500 bond. The arrest affidavit does not indicate whether the Trump flag was recovered, or why Mazzara was not charged with theft.

    While Mazzara and Pelland are both registered voters, neither has declared a party affiliation, records show.

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    As his Tesla operated in autopilot mode on a North Carolina highway, a motorist was watching a movie on his phone when the vehicle crashed into a police car early this morning, investigators say.

    According to police, Devainder Goli, a 66-year-old emergency room doctor from Raleigh, was traveling home just after midnight on Highway 64 when his Tesla Model S sedan struck a Nash County Sheriff's Office patrol car (which then caromed into a North Carolina State Highway Patrol vehicle).

    A sheriff’s deputy and a state trooper had stopped on the highway due to a previous accident. While they were knocked to the pavement in the Tesla crash, neither was seriously injured.

    A subsequent investigation determined that Goli (seen above) was watching a movie on his phone while the Tesla was in autopilot mode. Due to an assortment of cameras and ultrasonic sensors, the electric car manufacturer claims autopilot is safer than a human driver in average driving conditions.

    Pictured above, Goli has been charged with a pair of vehicular law violations, including driving a motor vehicle while “viewing any television, computer, or video player.”

    Goli’s damaged Tesla and the sheriff’s squad car are pictured below.

    Police have not identified what movie Goli was watching when the crash occurred.

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    After repeatedly being asked to wear a mask inside an Ace Hardware store, a Florida Man allegedly coughed directly in the face of an employee before backhanding the victim and then striking a customer in the face, cops charge.

    Russell Wood, 51, was arrested for battery following a confrontation yesterday afternoon at store in Largo, a city in the Tampa Bay area. The 6’ 6”, 200-pound Wood was booked into the Pinellas County jail on the misdemeanor count. A judge this morning set his bond at $250.

    Police charge that Wood (seen at right) was asked by employees to leave the hardware store since he “refused to wear a mask.” While being asked to vacate the business, Wood “turned around and coughed directly in the face" of a male employee, according to an arrest affidavit.

    Wood then “took a small step backward and slapped the victim with the backside of his hand,” cops say. While subsequently “being ushered out of the business,” Wood “struck a customer in the face as well.” Police allege that Wood also threatened to burn down the hardware store.

    Wood fled the scene, but was quickly apprehended by Largo Police Department officers. “The defendant advised he was defending himself and admitted to striking the victim,” a patrolman reported.

    Wood’s rap sheet includes convictions for drunk driving (twice), violating probation, and habitually driving with a suspended or revoked license.

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    A dispute between next-door neighbors over the placement of political yard signs turned violent, with a Donald Trump supporter punching a Joe Biden backer in the face, Florida cops allege.

    According to police, a confrontation Friday afternoon resulted in the arrest of Anthony Vullo, 55, on a misdemeanor battery charge.

    Vullo, seen at right, reportedly was miffed that Joseph Lebert, 48, had placed a Biden sign in front of his Trump sign, thus obscuring it from the view of passing cars and pedestrians on their street in DeBary, a city 25 miles north of Orlando.

    Vullo is a registered Republican, while Lebert is a registered Democrat, according to state voter records.

    After a witness notified him that Vullo had “took his political yard sign from his yard and threw it across the yard,” Lebert confronted his neighbor. Lebert told cops Vullo “stated it was rude of him to place a political yard sign in front of his own and blocking it from view.”

    Lebert said that he and Vullo then pushed each other before Vullo punched him in the face. Though he had “obvious signs of injury over his left eye,” Lebert declined medical treatment, police reported.

    While Vullo admitted that he “tossed” Lebert’s Biden sign, he claimed that he only punched Lebert after his neighbor swung at him and missed. A witness, however, corroborated Lebert’s account of the incident.

    After being booked into the county jail, Vullo was released on his own recognizance in advance of his September 14 arraignment on the misdemeanor count. He has been ordered by a judge to have no contact with Lebert, and has been prohibited from possessing firearms or other weapons, according to a pretrial supervision order.

    As seen below, the Vullo and Lebert residences share a contiguous front lawn that is only separated by a picket fence fragment.

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    A Florida Man yesterday choked his pit bull to death after the dog bit his girlfriend on the ankle, according to a criminal complaint.

    Joseph Wayne Walker, 38, allegedly killed the animal in the front yard of his Pinellas Park home around 1 AM Sunday. Walker, seen at right, was charged with cruelty to animals, a felony, in connection with the strangling of the 10-year-old canine.

    Cops say the 25-pound pit bull bit Walker’s girlfriend, resulting in a laceration to her ankle. When the woman entered the house to clean the wound, she told Walker--who was asleep at the time of the dog bite--what occurred.

    Walker, cops allege, responded by bringing the dog to the home’s front yard, where he straddled the animal and “choked it using two hands.”

    During subsequent police questioning, Walker reportedly admitted to killing the dog, and told officers that it “took a couple of minutes for the dog to die.” Walker, cops noted, had “scratch marks on his stomach from the dog trying to get out of the chokehold.”

    The arrest affidavit does not disclose how police learned of the strangulation.

    Walker was released early today from the county jail after posting $10,000 bond. A judge has ordered Walker to be outfitted with an alcohol monitor and has barred him from having any pets.

    Walker is a felon whose rap sheet includes convictions for domestic battery; marijuana possession; drunk driving; obstructing police; felony battery; criminal mischief; and violating a restraining order.