Buster

With Valentine’s Day approaching, is there anything more romantic than having sex with your partner in broad daylight in front of a Wendy’s as motorists pass by on a busy highway?

According to police, Demetria Wilson, 53, and Tymario Merrell, 29, were caught in the act Saturday afternoon in Clearwater, Florida.

Officer Parker Moody reported spotting Wilson and Merrell laying on the ground “behind the bus stop in view of the busy highway.” The bus stop is in front of a Wendy’s restaurant and adjacent to U.S. Highway 19.

Wilson, unencumbered by pants, was on her right side “with her buttocks facing” her partner. “Merrell’s pants were pulled down” and he was in a “turgid” state as he “repetitively” engaged with Wilson.

The couple was busted and charged with performing an unnatural and lascivious act. Wilson and Merrell, both of whom have lengthy rap sheets, remain locked up in lieu of, respectively, $150 and $500 bond.

They have each pleaded not guilty to the misdemeanor charge.

A 7-Eleven customer used a banana to batter a store clerk, according to Florida police.

Caltaeviya Turner, 22, got into a “verbal altercation” with the 30-year-old female worker and the women exchanged “derogatory comments towards each other,” according to a police report.

At one point, Turner “became irate” and “picked up a banana from the cashier counter and threw the banana at the victim’s face.”

The airborne fruit struck the employee “on the cheek bone and left a minor abrasion,” investigators noted. The banana was not seized as evidence.

Seen at right, Turner was arrested Thursday for battery and booked into the county jail on the misdemeanor count. Police records list Turner’s employer as Baby Dolls, a Clearwater gentleman’s club located four miles from the 7-Eleven outlet.

Turner is being held without bond for violating probation in connection with a grand theft conviction in a neighboring county (Turner stole about $800 worth of merchandise from a Walmart store). Regarding that felony case, Turner has previously been cited for failing a pretrial intervention program, as well as for not performing 75 hours of community service or paying court fines.

Turner was also recently arrested for resisting and giving cops a false name when they responded to a trespass call at Baby Dolls. She was free on $1000 bond in that case when she was collared for the alleged banana battery.

A drug counselor at a New York State rehab facility sold crack cocaine on “multiple occasions” to undercover agents, according to police who arrested the alleged dealer on felony narcotics charges.

Acting on tips from the public, investigators began probing Alvin Lewis, 54, and subsequently identified him as a “narcotic and dangerous drug dealer” operating in Dutchess County towns about 80 miles north of New York City.

On “multiple occasions,” Lewis sold crack to agents with the local prosecutor’s Drug Task Force, according to officials.

While conducting surveillance of Lewis, police determined that he worked overnight hours as a counselor at Arms Acres, an in-patient rehabilitation clinic.

Pictured above, Lewis was busted Tuesday evening while driving a few miles from his Wappingers Falls residence. Subsequent searches of his home and vehicles yielded “crack cocaine packaged and ready for sale,” investigators say.

Lewis, who is being held without bail, is expected to face additional charges.

An online search of credentialing records maintained by New York’s Office of Addiction Services and Supports returned no records under Lewis’s name.

A Missouri motorist clocked going 107 mph told police that he was unaware he was speeding because he was preoccupied playing a video game while driving.

Dakota Trevon Crater, 25, was pulled over Friday night on Interstate 35 in Claycomo, a village about 10 miles north of Kansas City.

Crater was behind the wheel of a 2023 Nissan Sentra when cited for exceeding the posted 65 mph speed limit. Seen at right, Crater, cops say, was driving on a suspended license.

Police say that Crater admitted playing a video game while driving. He is facing speeding and other vehicular charges, and is scheduled for an April 15 court appearance.

Investigators did not quiz Crater as to what game he was playing while driving.

A review of the Kansas City resident’s TikTok page shows that he is a devotee of “My Hero Ultra Rumble,” a 24-player battle royale. In October, Crater posted five clips showing his exploits in the free online game.

After causing a three-car crash, a Colorado man--whose blood alcohol content was later measured at over four times the legal limit--explained to arresting officers that he was a “professional drinker,” according to an arrest report.

Investigators busted Matthew Kampmann, a 34-year-old Denver resident, for driving under the influence, careless driving, and operating an uninsured vehicle following a Wednesday afternoon accident earlier this month.

According to police, Kampmann (seen at right) plowed his 2000 Nissan Sentra into the rear of a Subaru stopped in traffic on a street in Wheat Ridge, a Denver suburb. The Subaru then lurched forward and hit a third car.

When cops contacted Kampmann, he allegedly smelled of booze, had bloodshot eyes, and his speech was slurred. When one officer asked another if there was indication of drug use on Kampmann’s part, the suspect piped in: “No drugs man just just just a lot of drinking.”

Kampmann would go on to explain that he was no amateur. “Matthew told me that he was a professional drinker while slurring his speech,” a cop noted. He later described himself as a “professional alcoholic” while preparing to take a breath test that would eventually record a .326 BAC (the state limit is .08).

A search of Kampmann--who said he consumed 10 drinks--recovered an empty Jim Beam shooter in a pants pocket, while “numerous empty and full Jim Beam shooters and several empty Modelo beer cans” littered his car floorboards.

Police later released Kampmann into the custody of his wife, who “was a sober driver.”

In 2020, a Florida Man assured cops that, “I’m a professional drinker” after being pulled over for speeding. George Emmanuel, now 59, had a BAC nearly triple the .08 limit. Arrested for DUI, he later copped to a reduced charge of reckless driving and was sentenced to 12 months probation, ordered to perform 50 hours of community service, and “attend DUI school.” 

Meet Mohammed Abdullah Alabilan.

The 27-year-old Pennsylvania man was arrested yesterday on a petty theft charge for allegedly stealing a lap dance.

Alabilan, cops say, “was buying a service” from a woman inside a Florida strip club when he “refused to pay the $40 service fee.” Seen above, Alabilan sought to leave the Reign nightclub in Clearwater without paying for the 2:45 AM private dance.

A deputy collared Alabilan after being told by a club manager that the patron “had not paid the $40.”

Charged with misdemeanor theft, Alabilan was booked into the county jail, from which he was released last night after posting, of course, $40 bond. A judge has ordered him to stay away from Reign, which features 55 televisions, three full-liquor bars, 30 private dance rooms, and several VIP suites.

Alabilan, seen above, received a bachelor’s degree earlier this year from Alvernia University, a private Franciscan school in Reading, Pennsylvania.