Mission Apparently Accomplished As Rate Of Saggy Pants Plummets

Earlier this month, the Dublin, Georgia city fathers amended an ordinance against public indecency to address the rampant saggy-pants epidemic terrorizing its citizens.

Well, we are pleased to report that, after three weeks, the battle against revealing wardrobes has made major strides. Police Chief Wayne Cain reports that there has not been a single saggy pants citation issued so far, and “the situation has improved greatly from people voluntarily obeying the ordinance.” Cain recounted only one instance where an individual has even been stopped by cops (though the suspect was promptly released after promising to “correct the problem”).

The indecency crackdown, passed unanimously on September 2, threatened those “wearing pants or skirts more than three inches below the top of the hips (crest of the ilium) exposing the skin or undergarments” with a $25 fine for the first offense and $200 for each subsequent offense. While Dublin’s leaders do not have plans to legislate other articles of clothing, City Attorney Lance Jones said he hopes the new ordinance has helped people “realize how stupid this fad was to begin with.”