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February 15, 2011

Cops: Inmate Had Condom Stuffed With 30 Items Crammed Up His Anus

A Florida inmate is facing new criminal charges after a strip search turned up a remarkable array of items hidden inside a condom sticking out of his rectum.

Neil Lansing, 34, was jailed Friday after being sentenced in Drug Court on a possession charge. It appears that Lansing stocked up on contraband in anticipation of serving his time, according to a Sarasota County Sheriff’s Office report.

During a “routine search of inmates” Friday night, jailers “observed part of a condom sticking out of the defendant’s anus.” After the item was dislodged, deputies discovered it contained:

* 17 round blue pills marked “54/199”

* 1 cigarette

* 6 matches

* 1 flint

* 1 empty syringe with eraser over needle

* 1 lip balm container

* 1 condom

* 1 CVS receipt

* 1 paper coupon

Lansing, pictured in the above mug shot, was charged with illegally possessing drugs (the blue pills were Oxycodone) and tobacco inside a county jail.

TAGS

buttocks, Florida, Sarasota, jail smuggling

Comments (19)

Submitted by glenp on Thu, 2011-02-24 10:44.
ANUS is the RING that holds back the content of your RECTUM man these writers got to get an anatomy lesson
Submitted by Mo Ma' on Fri, 2011-02-18 15:19.
Sounds like he had alot of room up in that cave....he propably could have crawled up into his own private butt cave and be reported missing from prison for least a couple of weeks....
Submitted by LVC on Thu, 2011-02-17 16:08.
I can just imagine how "crappy" tasting that cigarette would be after resting in his anal cavity. LOL!!!
Submitted by poob on Thu, 2011-02-17 12:25.
Flint? former Boy Scout? Be Prepared!
Submitted by Redoubt on Thu, 2011-02-17 00:54.
Not making excuses for dumb crooks and druggies but... we have created an entire class of non-violent criminal as well as a need for constant prison construction and staffing. At least we can identify where some of our tax money goes lol! Thanks TSG...
Submitted by bubba123 on Wed, 2011-02-16 14:52.
Lip Balm ! That was for the party they were going to have at the county jail. Chapped lips from all the kisses. HA!
Submitted by bubba123 on Wed, 2011-02-16 13:58.
This guy was going to set up shop in the county jail. I am a retired correctional officer and the craziest thing we had was a guy with a shank up his butt. When under going a strip search you are asked to squat and cough. This prisoner when asked to do this, a plastic tube approx. 1 inch in diameter and 12 inches in length with styrofoam end caps fell to the floor. Inside the plastic tube was an 8 inch piece of rebar that had been ground on the tip to a pin point,great for stabbing. These are not choir boys, or rocket scientist we are talking about.
Submitted by Duck Dodgers on Wed, 2011-02-16 10:18.
everything was making perfect sense until i got to the receipt and the coupon...
Submitted by sabaticl on Wed, 2011-02-16 12:21.
I'm thinking he KEEPS good records and didn't want to be accused of theft.
Submitted by killshot71 on Wed, 2011-02-16 14:15.
I'll bet the coupon was for more lip balm.
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