Motion Denied Because You're An Idiot

MARCH 6--In what is surely a first for the federal judiciary, a Texas bankruptcy judge has quoted from the Adam Sandler film canon in a recent opinion.

Dismissing a motion due to "incomprehensibility," Judge Leif Clark cited a scene from "Billy Madison," Sandler's 1995 comedy, in a footnote to a February 21 court order. "Deciphering motions like the one presented here wastes valuable chamber staff time, and invites this sort of footnote," wrote a miffed Clark.

Lawyers practicing before the 58-year-old jurist, who presides over cases in San Antonio, should tread lightly or Clark might again dip into the Sandler oeuvre for another stinging rebuke. "Hey, old man river, zip it or I will break your hip," from "Big Daddy" might work. Or perhaps the classic "Happy Gilmore" line, delivered by Sandler as he pummeled TV game show host Bob Barker: "The price is wrong, bitch." (2 pages)