Buster

Incensed that his pizza did not include the requested toppings, a Maryland man allegedly assaulted a Papa John’s worker with a metal pizza paddle in an attack that ended with the employee stabbing the customer in the stomach with a “pizza spear,” according to police.

Investigators say that after purchasing a pizza Wednesday evening, Herbert Harris, 40, returned to a Papa John’s in Woodbridge, a community 20 miles outside Baltimore, to “complain that garlic sauce and pepperoncinis were not included with the pizza.”

Harris, cops say, argued about the missing Italian peppers and garlic sauce with Robert Klein, a 26-year-old Papa John’s employee. During the dispute, Harris went behind the counter and “began chasing Klein around the store, physically assaulting him with a metal pizza paddle,” according to the Harford County Sheriff’s Office.

“Unable to escape the physical assault and in fear of his safety,” Klein “grabbed a pizza spear to defend himself from the attack, and stabbed Harris in self-defense,” investigators say. The spear is not further described in a police statement.

When cops arrived at Papa John’s, Harris, who lives two miles from the restaurant, was holding a t-shirt to a stab wound in his stomach. He was subsequently transported to a local hospital for “treatment of non-life-threatening injuries,” cops noted.

Charged with misdemeanor assault, Harris is scheduled for a September 20 District Court appearance.

An Alabama woman facing methamphetamine charges was wearing a Walter White t-shirt when arrested last night for failing to appear in court on the drug counts.

Misty Mays, 50, was collared Sunday evening on a misdemeanor rap for a court no-show in connection with her February arrest for possession of meth and drug paraphernalia (a meth pipe).

Mays was arrested earlier this year following an 11:30 PM traffic stop in Wetumpka, a city about 20 miles north of Montgomery. A police search turned up the meth and the pipe, investigators say.

As seen above, when Mays was apprehended yesterday on the failure to appear rap, she was wearing a mint-colored shirt with a large photo of White, the teacher-turned-meth kingpin portrayed by Bryan Cranston in “Breaking Bad.” In the photo, seen below, White/Cranston is pictured surrounded by stacks of cash.

Mays is being held in the Elmore County lockup in lieu of $20,500 bond, according to jail records.

A reputed Florida gang member is facing a felony charge for uploading a homemade rap video to YouTube, court records show.

Tito Burney is a member of St. Petersburg’s Auburn Park crew, according to police who Tuesday arrested the 26-year-old on multiple felony counts. Burney, seen below, is locked up on $80,000 bond.

Citing a law barring “criminal gang electronic communication,” police collared Burney for posting “Aint Duckin No Rec” to YouTube in mid-February. The 2:21 rap song, which has been viewed about 2100 times and has garnered four comments, is one of three videos on Burney’s YouTube page (which has 237 subscribers).

Police allege that the song contains lyrics that “are being utilized to benefit, promote, or further the interests of the Auburn Park gang” and “intimidate or harass other persons.” Specifically, a police detective in an arrest affidavit noted that Burney rapped about handling “beef” with firearms and spoke of “doing a drive by shooting” with a TEC-9 submachine gun.

In the video, which was filmed outside a St. Petersburg food market, Burney--who is wearing a balaclava and a Lacoste t-shirt--“appears to be holding real firearms,” Detective Michael Bletsch alleged.

When Burney was apprehended Tuesday evening on the rap video count, he was allegedly carrying a stolen Beretta handgun, which allowed cops to charge him with three additional felonies.

Burney’s rap sheet includes convictions for criminal mischief; grand theft auto; possession of drug paraphernalia; obstructing police; trespass; heroin possession; fleeing law enforcement; Ecstasy possession; and firearms possession by a convicted felon.

A “heavily intoxicated” Florida Man was arrested Saturday night for calling 911 to report that his girlfriend “wished to eat Sour Patch Kids” according to police.

An arrest affidavit does not reveal why Joshua Larson, 37, allegedly phoned the police emergency number at 11:45 PM with the candy dispatch.

When asked about the call by a sheriff’s deputy, Larson “smiled and walked away” from cops outside his residence in Madeira Beach, a city 10 miles from St. Petersburg.

Seen above, Larson allegedly struggled with deputies as they sought to place him in handcuffs. An “electronic control weapon” was eventually used to take Larson into custody, according to the affidavit.

Charged with misuse of the 911 system and obstruction, Larson was booked into the county jail, from which he was freed yesterday afternoon on his own recognizance. As part of his release conditions, Larson has been ordered by a judge to not consume alcohol and has been outfitted with an alcohol monitoring device.

Larson was arrested in November for allegedly shoving his girlfriend and knocking her phone from her hand during an altercation in their Clearwater apartment. Prosecutors subsequently declined to pursue a misdemeanor domestic battery count against Larson.

It is unclear whether the alleged victim in the 2021 case is the same woman who sought to consume the Sour Patch Kids candy.

A woman found naked from the waist down told Pennsylvania police that snakes had eaten her pants, according to a court filing.

Responding last Thursday afternoon to multiple 911 calls about a half-dressed woman walking in the middle of a road about 25 miles from Philadelphia, cops found Gloria Harpel, 35, “naked from the waist down and she was rambling.”

Harpel, who police suspected of narcotics use, initially said that she had put her pants in a storm drain before contending that “snakes had eaten them.”

Pictured at right, Harpel--who was reportedly “sweating profusely” and “making nonsensical outbursts”--was arrested for indecent exposure, disorderly conduct, and public drunkenness. She was booked into the Montgomery County jail on the misdemeanor counts.

A probable cause affidavit does not provide a further description of the purported trouser snakes.

A trespassing suspect with “his pants opened and genitals exposed” explained to Florida police that he was “doing a chant and was cleansing himself spiritually” when he was discovered at 2:15 AM on the premises of a closed Mexican restaurant, according to a court filing.

Cops say that Kenneth Grey, 29, tripped a silent alarm after jumping a fence early Monday at the Red Mesa Cantina in St. Petersburg.

When officers arrived at the restaurant, Grey was seated inside a fenced area near the outdoor bar “with his pants opened and genitals exposed.” Grey, seen at right, was detained and subsequently charged with loitering and prowling, a misdemeanor.

After being read his rights, Grey reportedly acknowledged trespassing and told police he was “doing a chant and was cleansing himself spiritually.”

Grey is locked up in lieu of $250 bond and has been ordered to stay away from the restaurant. His rap sheet includes prior convictions for trespassing, obstructing police, and possession of an open container of alcohol.